Anyway I do not really have much to say as nothing has being happening. I am still dieting and still losing weight slowly; I can’t notice much difference myself but everyone else says they can so it must be working which means I have no reason to give it up and get back to real food ……… DAMN.

Seriously though it is not too bad. I do get cravings but they are more mental then physical as I never really feel hungry but I just wish I could get over needing comfort food when feeling down. Don’t worry I have not cheated but it has being hard at times but I know the feeling I get after stuffing my face with crap is a lot worse to deal with then the need for it in the first place.

Big excitement this week though as Cambridge announced a new product; Porridge! You may not think this is a big deal but after months on shakes and bars something warm and thick (get that rude thought out of your head right now) will be a real change. Some lucky so and so’s have already had chance to try it and have given it the thumbs up but us mere mortals have to wait a bit longer.

Well that’s about it for now, tune in some time soon …….. Ok maybe not soon but sometime for the next thrilling instalment of The Dogs Den *cue theme music*.

All my life I have been overweight but I was always active, always worked, always had a good social life, used to run youth club for disabled kids 3 nights a week etc, then just over ten years ago I had an accident at work and developed a condition called Lymphoedema in both of my legs. I carried on working against doctor’s orders for nearly 4 years which made the condition worse, but at the time my mom was ill with the same condition and mine was the only income so I had no choice. Anyway six year ago the company I was working for went bankrupt and I was made redundant. In some ways this was a good thing because mom needed me round a lot more as she could do less and less for herself. I guess we both turned to food for comfort and over the years I piled the weight on.

Four years ago my mom died, a side effect of her Lymphoedema, a blood clot travelled from her leg and blocked one of her lungs. One day I might tell you the whole story; it’s a day I will never forget.

The week after mom died out local council been the wonderful people they are decided I was not eligible to stay in the house I had lived in all my life and gave me a month to find somewhere else.

In the space of a month my whole life changed, no mom, no house, no family to speak of but I got a flat and tried to stay positive but the need for that comfort was still there, I dread to think how many take aways I have had over the space of the past four years, I don’t even enjoy them any more, but I get a buzz for a few minutes then hate myself, food has become my drug of choice and has lead me to where I am today, morbidly overweight, depressed and pretty much housebound.

Now is the time to change, I have to, there are no magic cures, only I can do this.

I had a bit of fun yesterday thanks to the council again. In my flat they did a really cheap rewire job so all of the sockets and wiring are on the outside of the walls not channelled in and plastered over. Yesterday I was changing my bedding, pushed my bed back into the corner and heard a loud crunch. Pulled the bed back out and found out the two wall sockets hanging off the wall. I decided the best thing to do would be to turn off the plugs that were in the sockets and all I can say is it was a shocking experience!

Physically this diet is not hard but mentally It’s a constant battle. You might think that sounds extreme but it really is a battle; on numerous times I have literally being having arguments with myself in my head over food. I don’t think I realised how much on rely on food for both comfort and company - I guess I really am an addict.

In the end I gave up to the fact that I needed to do a full system restore so spent the next three hours backing everything up and restoring the laptop back to the factory settings. I finally went to sleep about 3.30 after resigning myself to the fact I would spend all day today putting everything back on …………… and I did!

On a brighter note it was weigh in day today and I have lost another 10lb. This make 22lb in a month which is not quite the two stone I was hoping for but the way I am looking at it is any loss is a good thing now.

Anyway about three weeks ago they came and took half of it down so me being silly I presumed it was all going to go. Later that afternoon they came and put it back up again even though all the work was done and that was the last time I saw them.

Today I rang the council to see when it was going to go, and after going several departments I finally spoke to the guy in charge. I asked him when it would be going and he replied “you have no scaffolding”, I said “erm yes we do”. “Can you just go outside and check its still there” he asked. Now I kept my cool and politely pointed out that all I need to do is look out of my window to see twenty foot of metal piping attached to the outside. Anyway it will apparently be going in the next few days, will let you know if it does.